Deep Secrets
by PancaekPirate
Summary: Set when John is back at the ranch, I think I reject the reality where he dies a little bit. :   A small exploration of homosexuality in those times, between Jack and a character I made up, with Jack fearing his father's rejection. Hope you like it.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own Red Dead Redemption. Belongs to Rockstar.

First off, I know Jack's not 'that way inclined' I got inspiration for this from a scene in Undead Nightmare where Herbert Moon is being all Racist, homophobic etc. and I wondered what people's reactions would be in that time. So then this story came forth.

Apologies for it being so terrible.

There's nothing especially graphic, but the rating may change in the future depending on where I take it.

Please review, please and Enjoy :D

-Deep Secrets-

Jack's P.O.V:

I stumbled over the uneven ground, landing on my knees and grasping at the grass, trying to anchor my spinning vision. After I took several deep breaths I got back on my feet and climbed through the wooden fence that enclosed my Pa's ranch. I snagged my arm on a nail-the pain didn't register- and caught my foot on the fence post. I rolled to the ground, landing flat on my back. I looked up to the blurry stars twinkling above me before crawling back to my feet and making my way towards the dim lights originating from my family's ranch house, my head warm and fuzzy from liquor. I swayed up the porch steps, tripping on the last one and hitting the porch's floorboards with a thud.

John's P.O.V:

I jumped to my feet when I heard it and grabbed my revolver from my gun belt- on the nail where is hung to the side of the door- I swung the door open to find my son; Jack, lying ungracefully on the floor of the porch.

"Damnit Jack!" I was angry. Not only could he have been someone trying to kill us but he'd walked home. At night. Obviously drunk. He wasn't meant to be back 'til tomorrow and he wasn't meant to be doing something so stupid. I put my revolver back into it's holster and pulled my son to his feet, I could smell the liquor thick on his breath. He was staggering as I lead him into the house, his clothes were messy; scuffed with dirt and his face was pale. He looked confused and drunk enough to be sick.

I held him steady as we neared the door, I noticed hi arm felt wet, Inside the house I checked what it was and saw the crimson liquid soaking the cuff of his shirt sleeve at his elbow and running down to his hand.

"Jack, what in the hell have you been doing? And don't you know wondering at this time-in this state- can get you killed? I thought you were smarter than this." I tried not to be too harsh, he looked like he'd had a rough night.

"I, er… I don't know…" He lurched towards the floor after he spoke, I caught him and half carried him into the main room of the house, settling him on a chair, he seemed to sink into the cushion. With a sigh I fetched a clean cloth and a bowl of water and started to clean his arm. Without the blood I could see the deep gash on his forearm and worked at getting the dirt out of it, he didn't even flinch. I would take him to the doctor in the morning.

"Why are you back tonight? I thought you were out for the night partying with those boys from Blackwater?" I smiled slightly at that, I was glad he was getting on with his life.

"Don't. Don't talk about them…" He rubbed his face with his free hand. My smile faded and I grew concerned.

"Why? What have they done?" When I'd finished with his arm, I bandaged it and crouched infront of where he sat. He looked down at his arm.

"Thanks… He pushed himself up off the chair and steadied himself. I stood up next to him, I didn't want to insult him by trying to help steady him again; he didn't seem to be in a mood to accept help. He looked tired and didn't seem to want to talk, so I could talk to him in the morning after he'd sobered up.

"They haven't done anything Pa." As he looked away from me I noticed something on his neck, I leaned over and pulled his collar down. I saw the lovebite just before he pushed my hand away.

"So that's what you've been up to? I honestly didn't think you would be the type." I felt disappointed that it looked like he'd been fooling around. "Although it doesn't quite explain why you came home at this time" despite my disappointment, I felt a small smile tug at the side of my mouth.

"No! I, erm, it's nothing, just a bruise." He covered his neck with his hand and looked to the floor. His face grew red and I let out a small laugh.

"Maybe you should get some rest. Sober up." I started to guide him to his room when he suddenly stopped.

"Pa… I'm going to be sick…" I pulled him back outside and patted his shoulder as he puked into the bucket next to the porch. When he finished I helped him back inside and took him to the sink. I pushed his head into the basin filled with water, after a few seconds I pulled him back up, he coughed as water streamed from his hair down his face.

"I'm sorry Jack, Once more." After he caught his breath I dunked his head again, then let him go. He was coughing again and staggered back from the sink, falling to the floor. He looked up at me with a shocked expression on his face. I offered him my hand. "That was to sober you up. Now let's get you to bed." He took my hand and I pulled him to his feet. I followed him to his room and bid him goodnight before shutting the door behind him.


	2. Chapter 2

Jack's P.O.V:

The door closed behind me and I heard my Pa walk away, probably going to bed. The water had cleared my head a bit, but the floor still rocked beneath my feet. I had more than enough to be embarrassed about tonight. I stripped off my clothes and got into bed. I stared up at my ceiling thinking of the strange night.

I'd been out with some friends I had in Blackwater, the oldest of us; Sam had brought plenty of liquor with him to make the night go by. By night fall we were all quite drunk, Archer and Sam were not far from where me and William were-just behind the tent, lying down and looking at the night sky. William was taller than me, with slightly longer hair, except his was a dusty blonde. It was then that it happened. William sat up and called my name. I sat up next to him and he pulled my face to his and kissed me. Just once at first, he stopped and looked at me, our faces were close. I could feel his hand on the back of my neck; keeping me close, not that he needed to; I didn't react at all, I was shocked. He started kissing me again, deeper this time. He pushed me to the ground and climbed on top of me. He kissed down my jaw, his hands were pawing at my chest, all I could think of is that I wasn't stopping him, I wasn't objecting… It almost felt good. It was when he bit at my neck that I let out a strangled moan. How could a boy affect me like this, I wasn't homosexual, was I? But my breathing was deep, my hands were shaking… I was kissing him back! When he simultaneously bit hard at my neck and rubbed at the front of my pants, I got over-excited. I moaned a little too loud and we heard Sam shouting to u; asking if we were okay. William got off of me and answered, saying we were fine and just fighting, while I was winding down form a few waves of pleasure. He looked at me with sad eyes and spoke.

"I'm sorry Jack, I don't know what came over me…" His voice was ragged from kissing as I assumed mine would be too.

"I, I have to go" I got up shakily and started to walk home. As I passed Sam and Archer-Still wrestling, typical- I said my goodbyes and that I had to go. Sam tried to stop me, saying it would be too dangerous, but h was too drunk to be majorly concerned. I thanked that fact and carried on home.

I woke up the next day with a painful headache. The light burned my eyes and every sound seemed to pierce my ears. I sat up in bed, realising that my body ached and my arm was especially sore. I remember Pa helping me but how I did it was blurry. I felt my face go red as I remembered my Pa seeing my neck then having to help me as I was sick. I got out of bed and looked at my mirror, the bite marks trailed down my neck, they were sore to touch. I thought about how it felt when it happened, I shuddered as I traced my fingers along the marks, most were just red imprints of his teeth, but one or two were bruises; luckily they were on my shoulders, so my shirt would hide them. I didn't want any more questions, I wanted to forget it ever happened but I didn't think I could ever forget how good it felt.

I avoided Pa all day, I know he'd want to know why I'd do something as stupid as I did, aswell as express his disapproval of how he probably thinks the bite marks got there. I couldn't imagine how he might react if he knew it was in fact a boy that attacked my neck, that kissed? That I had kissed him back, enjoyed it to the point that I…. It wasn't worth thinking about. I'd never put so much thought into anything sexual before.

After I finished my chores I went outside and went up the small hill south of the house. I sat under a tree and watched the sun set, sending golden waves across the land.


	3. Chapter 3

John's P.O.V:

I'd just finished tending to the horses and had walked into the house when Abigail walked up to me, she looked worried.

"John? I think you need to go talk to Jack. He's been acting weird all day, being quiet, I think he's got something on his mind. He seems unhappy."

"I was meaning to talk to him but I haven't had a chance all day." I tried not to sound hurt. Because I knew Jack had been purposely trying to avoid me. "I'll go find him" I went back outside and eventually found him sitting up on the hill. He didn't look at me when I sat down next to him. He seemed to be concentrating, he really didn't look happy. "So what's going on?"

"What do you mean Pa?"

"You know what I mean. I'm not the only one who's noticed, your Ma's worried too. What happened last night?" He looked down at the ground. He didn't seem angry, just troubled. "What did those boys from blackwater do? I want to know if you're in any kind of trouble."

"There's no trouble." He seemed genuine. Even looking me in the eye.

"What girls have you been foolin' around with?" I said, pointing to his neck. He oaused before he answered.

"I don't know" He looked at the ground again and seemed to tense up. "I can't remember." He was lying.

"Jack. I don't know what happened to you last night but what I do know is that I can't help you if you lie to me." I tried to sound as unthreatening as I could. He stayed looking at the ground, he was biting at his lower lip and gripping at his knees, pulling them against his chest. I think he understood, so I pressed the matter further. "Tell me what happened."

"I'd like to, look, thanks, but I don't need help. Everything is okay" He was panicking. He stood up and walked forward a bit, his head in his hands.

"I'm sorry Jack. But you're not very convincing. What were you doing? I know you wouldn't of done something as stupid as walking home in that state without a damn good reason and you shouldn't be getting drunk and messing around with girls!" I was getting angry, but what he said next left me speechless. He turned around and shouted at me.

"It wasn't a girl!" I didn't know what to say to him, we just stared at each other.

"You did that with a boy…?" The words came out shakier than I intended.

"I was really drunk, I didn't start it, I hadn't wanted it to happen." He looked scared and I was determined not to scare my son.

"I'm not angry" I stood up I just need to understand. You didn't want it to happen, but you seemed to haveto have let it go quite far wouldn't you say?" I gestured to his neck, which he covered defensively. He looked away from my face and folded his arms around himself.

"I didn't know what I was doing, I didn't know what to do!" He looked up at me. "It just happened…" I couldn't bare the fear on his face any longer. I stepped over to him and put my arms around him, he flinched as I got close and he shook slightly in my embrace, but I didn't want to let him go.

"Calm down, I'm not going to hurt you." He kept his arms around himself but buried his head in my shoulder.

"I'm sorry" I tried to think of something to say, was my son homosexual? I didn't feel angry about it, I love him, I always would.

"Did you want it to stop? I had to understand.

"I wasn't thinking straight, I was shocked. But I'm not sure I did" He unfolded his arms and put them around me.

"Are you… that way inclined?" I clenched my teeth waiting for his reply. I realised that I was anxious about his answer. He pulled away from me and stepped back.

"Look, I don't know, Pa. I know I like girls, but…"He looked down. "I guess I liked that too"

"Jack, you're my son no matter what, I'll love you and support you no matter what. No matter what you do or don't like." He seemed to calm down.

"What if I am?" He looked at me, I could see the uncertainty in his eyes.

"Then I'll accept that" I meant it.

"What about Ma?" I hesitated before I answered; giving it thought.

"I think you should give what you want some thought. Tell her when you're sure. She loves you too, she'll be happy with whatever makes you happy." He gave a small smile which I returned, but I could tell that he was still unsure. He sat back down in his spot under the tree, so I sat back in mine.

"I'm sorry about all of this, I wish no one had noticed, that it hadn't happened in the first place. It's been going through my head all day. I felt, I feel ashamed but, I liked it" He bit at his lip. I knew how strong he was being by telling me this.

"You don't have to tell me this if it's making you uncomfortable." He turned his head towards me slightly and his eyes flickered up to look at me.

"I want to… I need to… unless you don't want yo hear?"

"I want to listen to you. Carry on." I put my arm around his shoulder.

Jack's P.O.V:

It felt good to be telling him this because I wanted to, and not because he got angry so I'd have to. Running had crossed my mind, but that was a silly idea.I wouldn't ever tell him this, but I was scared. I think he knew anyway, but he'd convinced me that he still loved me regardless, I felt safe. Although I never thought I'd be having this conversation with my Pa, or at all for that matter. I wanted tyo tell him everything but I was unsure of where to start.

"I was really drunk if it makes you feel any better. I can't even remember how I did this" I lifted my bandaged arm that he had tended to last night. I'd refused to go to the doctor this morning. It made me smile to think how he cared for me. Despite how embarrassing my behaviour was.

"I don't need to feel better, I'm happy if you are." He gave me a broad smile and I carried on talking.

"I didn't mean to like it" I felt my cheeks burning already. This was going to be hard

"You can't help what you like." I felt him give my shoulder a reassuring squeeze, it gave me some strength to continue.

"Despite what you might think, I've never…" I hesitated "done anything like that before, with anyone…" He gave a small laugh.

"Stop being so embarrassed, you don't have to be embarrassed about anything when you're talking to me." I smiled up at him, I was happy that he had said that, but it didn't really help. "I sort of figured that you hadn't, I could see how embarrassed you were" I felt so relieved that he seemed to understand me, I closed my eyes and listened to him. "It's nothing to be ashamed about, trust me. Now, tell me everything that happened last night." I took a deep breath and opened my eyes, looking forward to the dark landscape.

"I'm not sure what happened, it's all really blurry. I was with William. Archer and Sam were off fighting, as usual." We both smiled. He had met them before, he knew their habits. He seemed to like them although he didn't approve of their apparent talent for getting into trouble. "They couldn't see us, not that they were paying attention." I wanted to run through every detail, I needed to get the story out clear. "William sat up and called my name, I assumed he had something to say… but he kissed me, just once then he looked at me, I could see want in his eyes, that confused me. I didn't say anything to him, I didn't even think. All I could do is look at him back." I felt myself shake, his could change his mind about accepting me at any time.

"Why didn't you ask him not to while you had the chance?" I envied his calm.

"I didn't think to. And before I knew it, he did it again. I started to enjoy it and things got out of hand…" I had to swallow hard and I tensed my fists to force out my words. "and I got over excited…"

"You mean you-"

"Yes Pa." I cut him off before he could say it aloud. I suddenly felt nervous. He laughed and looked away from me. "What?"

"I didn't think you would be that easy" He laughed again. I gave him a horrified look and turned away. "Calm down, I'm joking." I glared at him and elbowed his ribs, smiling from the side of my mouth. "It's understandable, don't worry, you're young, you were drunk and considering your lack of experience…" It felt a little patronising but it was true I guess. He was smiling at me, a gentle smile that was reserved for me, a fatherly smile. "What happened after… that?"

"I came home. I guess I wasn't thinking of how stupid it was and I didn't really care. I just felt horrible that I had enjoyed it, I didn't want it to stop. I, got worried about what you would do…" I couldn't look at him.

"I'm to be honest." My heart sped up. "I wasn't happy and at some points, yes, I was angry. But I've thought about it and as I've said, I'm happy if you are. All I've ever wanted for you is to be happy." He looked intently at my face, I could see that he looked worried. "I swear, as far as I'm concerned, you've done nothing wrong. But, I can tell you, it would be best to keep this quiet. I suppose I don't have to tell you why." It hurt to hear to hear it aloud but it was true and I had thought about it earlier.

"Yeah I know. I don't want anyone to know anyway." He gave me a reassuring look, there wasn't anything more that could be said about it.

"What about William?"

"What about him?" I sounded bitter. I started to feel defensive, I'm not sure why.

"What did he say, and what did you say to him?" His questions surprised me, even if they were perfectly reasonable.

"After it happened, he said sorry. I said I had to go and left." I was starting to feel calmer, breathing easier.

"just sorry?"

"He didn't say it like that, I could tell he meant it. I didn't give him chance to say much else." As soon as I said that I suddenly felt about leaving so abruptly.

"Ouch, leaving a guy hanging like that." He smiled broadly and I couldn't help but laugh. "I'm serious, you're not planning on talking to him again? I don't think you'll manage to avoid him forever. Don't think I didn't get suspicious about you refusing to go to the doctor this morning. Although I never would have suspected this."

"In my defence, it was partly because I didn't want anyone else to see the marks, aswell as not see him." He noticed more than I gave him credit for. "I hadn't really thought that far ahead."

"You'll have to face him sooner or later." He gave me a concerned look and I knew he was right.

"I'll talk to him tomorrow."

"Good. Come on, it's late. You look tired, I think you should be getting some rest." He stood and helped me up.

"Pa, Can I ask something?" I looked up at him.

"Anything."

"Erm… nevermind." He gave me a quizzical look but I tried to avoid looking at him. I wanted to ask, but I couldn't. not yet.

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah"

"Okay… let's go in then" We made our way inside and I went straight to bed, pausing at the door to ask if he was going to say anything to Ma. He said it wasn't his place to. I was happy about that. He said that it was down to me when I was ready.


	4. Chapter 4

John's P.O.V:

I had a lot to think about. I really did have no problem as long as he was happy. Besides, he said he still likes girls. I suppose I would have more of an issue if he didn't at all, but that was natural, right? I can't express how much he need to keep the information closely guarded. How much I needed him to. I hear what happens to homosexuals who don't hide it. They have a habit of ending up dead. End of.

It hurt at first, but then I realised that is it was what he wanted, then I wanted to be there for him. But I need him to be careful, I have to watch him and stop him from making any other stupid decisions.

Abigail had already fallen asleep when I came in. I'd been outside for longer than I had thought. I got ready for bed and soon fell to sleep.

I was up in time to see the sun rise. I watched it appear over the horizon. I was outside on the porch, it was warm out, despite the early hour. Jack was up not long after me, he came outside and stood next to me, leaning on the railing. He didn't say anything, just watched the sun rise with me.

"We're making a habit of this" He laughed.

"Sorry Pa, I'll try not to have so many problems in future" He smiled.

"See that you don't" I soon gave in and asked him what was on my mind. "Last night, what were you going to ask?" I glanced over to him and noticed that he looked unsure, nervous even.

"I don't think I'm ready to ask yet. But I will, don't worry." I nodded. He sighed and stepped back.

"I need to go sort…. That thing we talked about, I'll be back later on."

"Be careful." I shot him a serious look before patting him on the arm and walking inside. This was hard for me; it must be even harder for him. I must make sure he's not going through this alone.

Jack's P.O.V:

I got myself and my horse ready to go. It was taking all my courage to get moving, I hadn't planned what I was going to say; on the ride there I could think of nothing. When I was face to face with William I didn't have a word to offer. Luckily, he did.

"Yeah I know, we need to talk. You deserve an explanation. But not here." He looked around. " Meet me at the lonely tree, I'll be there as soon as I can." I nodded.

"Okay" and with that I made my way there. The 'lonely' tree was where we ( meaning usually all of our group) normally met. It was a large tree on a hill not far from the town-not visible though either- that was, for all intents and purposes, in the middle of nowhere. It had a small broken fence near it where I hitched my horse before leaning back against the trunk of the tree to shelter myself from the sun.

I watching him ride up to me. He looked nervous. I didn't blame him. I was too. He hitched his horse next to mine and walked over to me. There was an awkward silence between us as, yet again, I still hadn't thought of anything to say. Apparently he hadn't either.

"Jack, I don't really know what to say so I'm just going to have to be blunt with you." I could see him trembling. He took another step towards me. "Yes, I'm homosexual. And I was really, really drunk…" "oh…" I couldn't think of anything else to say. He wasn't looking at me directly. I was shocked to find that I felt disappointed because it seem the whole experience was a drunken mistake to him, regardless of the fact that he preferred men. I wanted to make excuse and leave, if only to hide my disappointment. But he spoke before I had the chance to make up my mind.

"There's something else… I'll understand if you want me out of your sight from now on. Frankly I'm surprised to see you now. You seemed to react pretty badly after what happened, what with you up and leaving like that. I didn't know what happened to you, I figured I'd make it worse if I came after you or came to see you yesterday… But thing is… I like you Jack, a lot more than I should…" I looked straight at him, as he was doing at me. I felt the red blush burn its way across my face. It was starting to annoy me just how many times he had me speechless. He stepped close to me and my breathing deepened, my heart started to race and I started to tremble as he touched my cheek and slowly swiped a few strands of air away from my eyes. "I love your eyes…" He spoke softly but his touch was electric to me, it sent shivers down my spine. He leaned one arm on the tree behind me; half trapping me, while his right hand continued caressing my cheek and the soft of my neck. He leaned in a kissed me, but not like the other night. This was soft, gentle, his lips lightly brushing against mine. I melted into that kiss, but reality soon came crashing in around me. As the kiss started to deepen I put a hand on his shoulder and gently pushed. He got the message and backed off.

"I'm sorry, I just can't resist you…"

"It's okay, just, not here…" He seemed surprised.

"You mean you actually want to?"

"I'm not sure, I have a lot to think about." I smiled at him.

"I understand" He smiled back. I mounted my horse and with a nod, I was off. I looked around us to see if anyone has seem our 'brief exchange', I couldn't see anyone so I carried on.

I slowed my horse to a walk on the approach to the barn, I felt the need for life to slow down. After I'd put away the riding gear I went inside, exchanged smiles with my pa and sat down with a book. Ma eyed us both suspiciously, but didn't say anything.

John's P.O.V:

I wanted to ask him what was said. I was starting to obsess slightly over whether or not he was going to make any foolish decisions. Everything was fine at the moment but it only takes one thing to go wrong and he could be in danger. Again. When Abby left the room I gave in and asked him.

"Well how did it go then?" He looked up from his book.

"Good, I guess" He was smiling but I could tell he had something on his mind.

"So…" I was unsure how I'd feel if he said yes to this. "Are you two, together…?" He looked surprised and embarrassed that I had asked.

"No. we're not…"

"Do you want to be?" I was trying not to look as worried as I felt, but I wasn't sure that I was succeeding.

"I don't know. I have quite a bit to think about…"

"I'll bet. Hey, I've got to go out for a bit but I'll be back later, why don't you give me a hand with the horses when I get back?"

"Sure thing Pa." He seemed happy enough. Just then Abby came back in. I stood up and walked over to her.

"I'm off now darlin'"

"Alright, you be careful." I kissed her goodbye and left.


	5. Chapter 5

John's P.O.V:

I wanted to ask him what was said. I was starting to obsess slightly over whether or not he was going to make any foolish decisions. Everything was fine at the moment but it only takes one thing to go wrong and he could be in danger. Again. When Abby left the room I gave in and asked him.

"Well how did it go then?" He looked up from his book.

"Good, I guess" He was smiling but I could tell he had something on his mind.

"So…" I was unsure how I'd feel if he said yes to this. "Are you two, together…?" He looked surprised and embarrassed that I had asked.

"No. we're not…"

"Do you want to be?" I was trying not to look as worried as I felt, but I wasn't sure that I was succeeding.

"I don't know. I have quite a bit to think about…"

"I'll bet. Hey, I've got to go out for a bit but I'll be back later, why don't you give me a hand with the horses when I get back?"

"Sure thing Pa." He seemed happy enough. Just then Abby came back in. I stood up and walked over to her.

"I'm off now darlin'"

"Alright, you be careful." I kissed her goodbye and left.

Jacks P.O.V:

The next day I had to ride into town to run an errand, while crossing the Great Plains I noticed that I was being followed , I carried on towards town. I had to slow when I saw two men on horses closing in on my path ahead of me, I knew what was going to happen, this couldn't be a coincidence. And I had no means to defend myself.

Before I knew it, someone roped me from behind and dragged me off my horse. Hitting the hard ground winded me, for a few seconds my sight was blurred. The man holding the rope walked up behind me, he kicked me, the blow hitting my waist, it hurt, but I gritted my teeth and refused to let it show. The two that were in front of me dismounted and walked over to me, one kicked my face while the other stamped on my stomach. I held my stomach, the rope stopped my arms from moving far enough to protect my face. The rope man behind me spoke.

"This is what queers get!"

"I'm not-" He cut me off with another kick to my side. The others took this as a cue to lay into me, it was a blur of kicks and stamping. The pain was incredible, but it didn't last long, soon the rope holder dragged me up to my knees by my hair and punched me. He untied me before kicking my sharply in the ribs. I fell to the ground and heard them walk and then ride away.

I don't know how long I laid there, just listening to my breathing, before I attempted to move . Moving proved painful. I rubbed blood off my mouth and held my ribs as I stood up. I felt broken.

I looked around to find that my horse had not run too far away, I whistled to him. It took all of my effort to mount him, I all but collapsed when I finally managed to, I was hunched over his neck, one arm clutching my ribs and stomach while the other held onto the reins and leaned on the saddle to keep myself upright. I steered my horse towards the ranch, every step sent jolts of pain through my body, it was too painful to go fast. I kept my eyes focused on home, it kept me going. By the time I passed the fence I was ready to drop, tears were forming and a few rolled down my cheeks. I saw my pa but he was looking the other way. I wanted to shout but my throat burned, all I could muster was a faint croak. But he must have heard the horse because he turned around, When he saw me he dropped what he was doing and sprinted over to me. I felt darkness take me over, I must have fell in and out of consciousness several times because I kept missing things. I remember him running to me and suddenly he was next to me. I went again and woke up in his arms, the sun was in my face, it was blinding me. The next time I opened my eyes was to the sight of my Ma, she was crying, I could see her mouth moving but I couldn't hear her words. I felt someone undoing my shirt, presumably to help me, I was pretty sure I was covered in blood, I remember my hands being wet with it. I looked down to see it was my Pa. I tried to stop him, I didn't want him to see how weak I was.

**I'm sorry it's taking me ages to update and this chapter is quite short in comparison to the others, I hope you all like it so far. Please R&R, I'd love to hear what you all think **


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